Broken in Two
by Johnnypanic
Summary: Pre-series, deals with the aftermath of Shelley's party, will be AU with some parts of the show worked in. This is my take on things. I don't know where this is headed, but I'm a LoVe-shipper all the way. M-rating, because you never know what happens.
1. Who will save your soul

**Broken in Two**

**Author's note: **I'll try to upload once a week, it'll all depend on what kind of response I get to the story. Please review, and tell me anything (good or bad) so I'll know if to continue or not.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything to do with Veronica Mars, cause if I did, Piz wouldn't even exist.

**Summary: **This is pre-series, takes place right after Shelley's party, and deals with everything that happened after that. This is my take on things.

* * *

To say that what Weevil saw that morning, cruzing down that particular road in the 09 district, was unusual during the weekends would be a complete and utter lie

To say that what Weevil saw that morning, cruising down that particular road in the 09 district, was unusual on a weekend would be a complete and utter lie. Young girls, with disheveled hair and smeared makeup. But this specific girl made him instantly turn his engine off. She didn't even notice, she just kept on walking.

_Damn __you Lilly. If it wasn't for you I wouldn't feel obligated to do this, hell I wouldn't even be in this neighborhood to begin with. _

"Yo! You need a ride?"

_Did she just flinch? Damn, it's like she didn't even know I was here. But that's hard to believe with this engine._

"Um, are you talking to me?"

"Yeah, do you see anyone else on this street in need of one?" He shot back.

"Um, no, I guess not." She looked around, as if she wasn't sure where she was. Or not sure of where she was going.

"Hop on, I'll take you home."

When she walked closer, Weevil couldn't help but wonder if her appearance was due to just another drunken night at some rich kid's house. She looked devastated. As if she just now realized that her so called perfect world had crumbled. As if something was missing. And then it dawned on him.

"Hey, you alright? Do you need me to take you to the hospital?"

She looked up fast, too fast, and as soon as she met his eyes he knew.

"Maybe the sheriff?" She whispered.

"Naw, that won't do you any good. That low-life won't help you now. I'll take you to the hospital. Hold on tight."

He thought he heard her whisper 'ok' but it was so discrete that he might as well have imagined it. The ride to the hospital was one of the longest ones he's ever had to make. She barely held on, as if she was afraid to. He could only think of what _she_ would have done now, had she been here. She probably would have kicked somebody's ass. _And I intend to, if I ever find out who did this._

"I'll wait right here, take your time. I'll just wait right here. You be alright?"

"Yeah, I think so." It was obvious that she had all sorts of demons fighting inside of her.

* * *

Veronica walked slowly towards the nurse behind the counter and asked if she could see a doctor. The nurse took in her appearance with worry creasing her forehead.

"If you could just fill these forms out, I'll make sure a doctor will be with you soon."

"Ok."

_How did this happen to me? How could they not stop this? I was just going to show them that I didn't need them, that I was fine on my own. I wish I hadn't. If I hadn't gone… I would take all kinds__ of backstabbing and whispers instead of this, I'd take anything instead of this. Who could've...?_

"Miss Mars?"

A tall, blond woman stood just by her chair. She looks friendly, but what if she isn't? Maybe she's just pretending like the rest of them? They all just seem to be pretending these days. How was she ever going to trust a smile again in her life?

"Yes, that's me."

"Ok, if you just come with me I'll help you with whatever concern you may have." _She sounds sincere. But they usually do. _

"What can I help you with Miss Mars? Veronica is it? Did something happen to you?"

"Yeah." She flinched as soon as she heard the sound of her own voice.

_It doesn't sound like me._ _Have I always sounded this weak, this vulnerable? Please say this isn't happening to me._

"Veronica, I need you to tell me what happened. I need you to tell me in as much detail as you can, so that I can determine what I can do to help you."

_What can I really tell her? Where am I supposed to start? When I was five and met Lilly for the first time? Or when she died? I don't know how this happened. I don't know how or why. It wasn't just last night. It started way before that._

"I went to a party. Last night."

"What happened at the party? Did you know the people there?"

"Yeah. I used to… I remember getting there. And I remember someone giving me a drink. And then I can't remember anything until I woke up this morning. It wasn't my bed, and my panties were on the floor. My dress was torn. I bought this dress with Lilly. She said it brought out my innocence."

_Oh, god. It hurts, it hurts so bad. I can't breathe, I really can't breathe. _

The doctor hesitated for a minute but then she put her arms around Veronica. _Screw the sacred Doctor-patient honor code. She's broken and alone. She's a little girl, and she's already broken and alone._

"Ok, Veronica, I'm going to have to draw some blood to see if you've been exposed to any drugs. And also to make sure that you haven't been exposed to any STD. I'm afraid we're going to have to do a pelvic exam also. Have you had one before? If not, you don't have anything to worry about. It'll be over soon."

"Ok."

* * *

It felt like forever waiting for her out there, he was starting to wonder if she'd snuck out back but then there she was. And her appearance hadn't changed at all. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all, but what else could he have done? He couldn't leave her to the wolves. Or in this town, the Lamb.

"Home?" She just nodded. He had seen it a lot from where he came from, but to see that kind of despair and loss in her eyes was worse. She used to be innocent. '_Used to' being the watchword. _

She hopped off and just stood there for a while looking up at her house, as if she wasn't ready. He was just about to speed off when she turned and looked him straight in the eye.

"Hey, Eli. Um, I mean, Weevil?"

"Yeah" He couldn't help but smirk at that.

"I, um, I mean, thanks."

"Anytime, V. Anytime, remember that."

"Ok." And before he could blink she was already inside.

_Yeah, anytime. As soon as they try to pick on her again, I'll show 'em. And I'll show her that there are still some people in this town that keep their promises._

* * *

She closed the front door as silently as she could and thanked God when no one was downstairs to see her. She crept up the stairs, and ran into her room when she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror at the end of the hall.

_That isn't me. That's someone else. It isn't me._

She chose to focus on the large amount of boxes piled everywhere instead. They were less than a week away from moving from the house where she grew up. If the lack of memories from last night weren't sufficient in informing her that her life was changing and would never be the same, then the boxes did a hell of a job. She barely made it inside her room, and under the covers, before her dad knocked on her door.

"Veronica, honey, I know last night was a real shindig but don't you think it's time you got out of bed? It's past noon you know."

"Yeah, dad, I'll get up in just a minute."

"Are you alright, sweetie, you don't sound so good?"

"I'm fine, just got in a little later than usual that's all."

"Ok, well I'm off to the office to try and get some work in. Hopefully we'll be able to get this show on the road sometime soon."

"Ok daddy, I might stop by later."

"Ok. I love you."

"Yeah, love you."

As soon as the door slammed she let out a sob that she wasn't even aware she was holding in. The world was spinning so fast and she didn't know what to do to hold on. She didn't know where to turn, or who she was supposed to be.

_How did this happen? Oh, god. Lilly, I need you. What if the tests come back positive for something? What then? How can they demand__ that I keep myself in one piece for four days? Four days of not knowing is just as bad as eternity. I've gone one hour and I already want to crawl under the covers and never come back out._

Veronica instantly felt like there was someone watching her, someone who wasn't supposed to be there. She peered out from underneath the covers, and that's when she heard that all too familiar voice.

"Veronica Mars, get out of bed!"

"Lilly?! What are you doing here? I thought…"

"Well, you thought wrong. Cause here I am. Did you really think this world would get rid of me that easily?"

"No, I…"

"Exactly, now get out of bed."

"But Lilly, I was… Someone… I can't."

"Veronica, you have to. You have to, or they've won. You're fabulous Veronica Mars; don't let them tell you otherwise. Now get up, for me. I'm right here beside you. I always will be. We're BFFs remember?"

Veronica blinked, just once, and then Lilly was gone.

"Lilly? Where'd you go?"

And with that she got out of bed.

_Lilly's right, I can't let them win._

* * *

After driving around town aimlessly for quite some time, Weevil knew exactly what to do to set his plan in motion. He needed his men to back him on this one, not that he couldn't take out those white little rich boys on his own. Naw, he needed eyes everywhere, and last time he checked he could only be in so many places at once. That is if you don't ask the Lamb in town, cause in that case he'd be everywhere. Driving fast down the most rundown streets of Neptune, he soon spotted the person he was looking for.

"Yo, Felix! Wait up!"

"Weevil, what's up?"

"I need you to do me a favor man. You know that girl Veronica right?"

"The new 09-pariah, ha, yeah man everybody knows her."

"Yeah, well from now on she's our _protegido."_

"Dude, why? Since when have we protected rich, little white girls against their own?"

"Since I said so! You know what she meant to Lilly, and if Lilly was still here she'd have both our asses for not doing anything sooner. So spread the word, but keep your mouth shut about why."

"Yeah, hombre, you've got it."

"Thanks man, I knew I could count on you. See you later man."

"Yeah, dude, later."

_I'm taking charge Lilly, don't worry, I'm taking charge. I'll have your girl protected in no time. If only you were here to see it, you'd be proud chica. Ha, naw, you'd probably laugh and tell me I've gone soft. Well, I always did have a thing for tiny blonde ones._


	2. A change is gonna come

**Broken in Two**

**Author's note: **Sorry about the delay in update, been kind of busy last week. I'll try to do better. Thank you so much for all the reviews, please continue with the feedback. Also, a million thanks to my beta Jessica.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything to do with Veronica Mars, cause if I did, Piz wouldn't even exist.

**Summary: **This is pre-series, takes place right after Shelley's party, and deals with everything that happened after that. This is my take on things.

* * *

Veronica stood in the shower for what seemed like forever. Time had changed itself in the last twenty-four hours.

_I was raped. I can't believe someone would do that. But Lilly's here, she's still here. I'll be alright as long as she's still here. I'm not alone. I can't be alone…_

"Veronica! Isn't it time you got out of the shower? You've been in there for almost an hour."

"Eh, yeah, I'm almost done mom. I'll be out soon, promise." Veronica said with all the normalcy she could muster.

"Yeah, well thanks to your father our water bills are going to have to magically disappear." Lianne said under her breath.

"I heard that. It's not his fault, and you know it." Veronica said to herself long after her mom had gone back downstairs.

She got out of the shower and tried her hardest not to look at the yellow and purple bruises that had formed on her thighs. _They're not there, they're not there, nothing's there._

Standing in front of the mirror she tried to see if something looked different. But she was still herself, nothing had drastically changed about her appearance, but maybe it should. If the change inside of her couldn't be seen automatically on the outside, then maybe she had to force it out.

* * *

"Hey! Hey, wake up!"

"Huh, where am I?"

"You're still in my bedroom, and I kinda need you not to be." _These freshmen-girls aren't the brightest are they?_

"Oh, well, do you want to have breakfast or something?"

"I've had breakfast, while you were still drooling on my pillow so I think maybe you should just go Barbie…"

"It's Cindy."

"Whatever."

_Oops, the girl even looked slightly embarrassed by her walk of shame. Maybe it was her first._

"Dude! I saw the babe walking out of here, must have been nice to tap that ass." Dick said, as he suddenly appeared in the doorway.

"Whatever _Dick_, don't you think it's a little early for your little-Bo-peep-show?"

"Hey, there's nothing little about my Re-shard!" _Heh, Dick always was sensitive about his lower regions._

"So totally not the point dude…"

"Whatever. Hey, nice little show Ronnie gave us last night."

"What are you talking about Dick?" Logan sighed.

"Oh, that's right, you left early. Well man, after the fun and games by the pool there were several dudes tapping her in the bedroom. High five!"

"She was totally out of it…"

"Shut up Beav." _How wasted did she get? Well, I guess if she's stupid enough then it's not really my problem. Not anymore._

"I'd tap that ass any day, she may be skanky but she sure is hot, right Logan?"

"Yeah, whatever man."

"Ms Skank-a-lot." Dick laughed as if he just thought up the funniest thing ever.

"Yeah..." Logan mumbled, almost inaudibly.

_It's not my problem anymore, it's not my problem. She chose the wrong side, it's not my problem. She's on her own now._

* * *

"Yo, Weevil!"

Weevil glanced up, while putting the finishing touches on his bike, when he heard his name called.

"What's up Felix?"

"I talked to the guys, and they're all in the clear. We've got her back come Monday."

"Thanks man, I appreciate it." Weevil wiped his oil-stained hand on his jeans and then shook Felix's hand.

"No problem hombre, we've all got your back. I told them to be discrete, but physical if they had to."

"That's cool. But no getting yourselves into unnecessary trouble, ya hear?"

"Naw man, you know us, we're stealth." Felix grinned.

"Yeah, see ya later man. Be stealth, you loser."

_The plan to save the tiny blonde one from the evil 09ers has begun. They won't know what hit 'em, I'll tell you that Lilly. If only you'd be here to witness it, you'd laugh your ass off. But then again, we wouldn't even be in this mess to begin with if it wasn't for you. Always the trouble-maker._

* * *

"So, Miss Veronica, in need of a change are we? How's your mother, sweetie?"

"She's fine Cecile, lots of packing to do though…"

"It's awful, some people have no shame. All your father tried to do is clean this whole mess up, and some people couldn't stand it. They had to make sure that we didn't get too comfortable in our skin, us _lower_ people. They couldn't have that, now could they honey?" Cecile smiled at the young girl.

"No, I guess they couldn't Cecile…"

"Just hang in there though, like our brother Sammy once said, a change is gonna come. You keep that in mind. Now, what can I do with these golden locks of yours?"

"Chop it off, give it some attitude, but keep it slightly above shoulder length."

"Your wish is my command my dear, you're going to look dangerous."

"Oh, I hope so, otherwise I want a refund." Veronica flashed a tiny smile.

_It doesn't hurt, smiling doesn't hurt. It can't hurt. I have to make it not hurt, I have to make them hurt, it's only fair if they hurt too._

* * *

"And there you go, an entire new you. Is this what you had in mind?"

"It's perfect; it's more me than before…"

"Now all you need is a new wardrobe. All the boys are going to follow you around like puppies."

"Yeah, or wolves." Veronica mumbled under her breath.

"What was that sweetie?"

"Nothing, thank you so much Cecile, it looks great."

"You're welcome, say hi to your mom and dad for me. Tell them to hang in there."

"I will." Once Veronica got out onto the streets of Neptune, she squinted as the sun hit her face.

_Schools starts again in two weeks, and I'll be damned if I even think about going back in anything remotely pink or pastel-ish. If they want to play rough then so be it, I won't be an easy target, not anymore. And I won't set foot in the mall__. I know there's some sort of alternative discount store here somewhere, I just have to find it. But I'm nothing if not persistent. And what do you know; there it is, just around the corner. Maybe I'm bound to be a P.I like dad._

* * *

"Black, black, dark green, black…"

"Can I help you?"

Veronica swirled around to find an alternative-looking girl with green streaks in her hair.

"Um…"

"Debating color schemes don't really go well with the range of clothing in this store."

"I can see that, but um, black suits me just fine..."

_I hope she doesn't think I'm being rude, but fashion advice was always administrated by Lilly so instead of asking someone else's opinion, I'd rather just be winging it on my own."_

"In need of a change? Cause I can totally relate." The girl said with the hint of a smile.

_But the girl does seem somewhat bored so I might as well give an actual conversation a go. It's not like I've had a whole abundance of them lately._

"Yeah, I guess I do."

"Well, you're Veronica right? I'm Mac, I've seen you around school?"

"Oh, I…"

"You've probably never noticed me, don't worry about it. That's High School. And we do kinda run in different circles…"

"Sorry, I guess it is High school. So are you're working here over the holidays?"

"Yeah, I worked at the Apple-store at the mall, but we had some disagreements over what's 'appropriate' to do on the store computers so I kinda quit."

_She seems to have a tendency to ramble, I do that too when I'm nervous. I guess being in need of a change isn't the only thing we have in common. _

"So, I'm guessing you're good with computers?" _Be social, Veronica. Not everyone's out to get you. Just the 09-ers. _

"Yeah, if I can say so myself, but that's not why they call me Mac though. My last name just happens to be Mackenzie so…"

"Well, maybe you can help me pick out a computer sometime? I mean, if you want, don't feel obligated to help me."_ Smooth, real smooth Veronica. Now ask her if she wants a glass of water to help her swallow down that milkshake filled with needy-Veronica._

"No, I'd be happy to. Maybe once school starts up, cause I'm pretty much forced to work here all day long. Do you want me to ring those up for you by the way?"

"Yeah, that'd be great. I should probably get going anyways. But I'll see you around then?"

"Definitely, I'll be on the look-out for you once school starts up."

"Ok, cool."

_Maybe I won't be as alone in school as I thought I'd be. I just need to look for other qualities in friends, because obviously the ones I've had in the past don't know how to st__ick by you when you hit bottom. Take one step at a time Veronica. And put 'stop giving yourself pep-talks' on your to-do-list, it kinda seems like a bad idea to mix things up by becoming schizophrenic. _

* * *

The house was pitch-black as Veronica walked through the front door. As she made her way down the hall and into the kitchen she found a note on the counter.

"I'm working late, and your mother's out with some friends. There are leftovers in the fridge."

_I'__m not even hungry. I'm pretty exhausted; maybe this change came a little too fast, cause all I want to do is crawl back under the covers. _

She made herself comfortable, hiding herself away from the rest of the world, and didn't even notice the unicorn music box and the note sitting across the room on her bureau.


	3. Games

**Broken in Two**

**Author's note: **I am soo sorry that I haven't updated in like a month, I've been gone and haven't been able to update. Thank you all so much for the reviews, thanks to my beta Jessica who puts up with me. And I promise that it won't be another month before I update again. Please keep reviewing.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything to do with Veronica Mars, cause if I did, Piz wouldn't even exist.

**Summary: **This is pre-series, takes place right after Shelley's party, and deals with everything that happened after that. This is my take on things.

* * *

"Mom, can you turn that off? You know I hate 'All You Need Is Love'."

_That's weird, if she's playing music in my room you'd think she'd at least respond when I talk to her. _

"Mom?! Can you turn that off?" Veronica opened one eye and looked around the room. Nothing. As she sat up she noticed the unicorn music box, playing 'All You Need Is Love', on her bureau.

Slowly she got up out of bed, suspiciously eyeing the music box. Unicorns, she always did have a thing for unicorns. The note attached had her mother's handwriting on it, and Veronica knew in her heart that it could only mean one thing. Her mother was gone. There really wasn't any point in reading the note, because deep down it would only make her angry instead of sad. But still she reached for the note, she just couldn't help herself.

"Veronica, I have to leave for a while. I'll be back for you. Love always, Mom"

_Oh my god, she's really gone. __How could she? How could she just leave us here?_

Veronica crumpled the note, and dropped it in the trash, along with the music box. And then walked out of her room without even giving it a second thought.

* * *

As Veronica made her way out into the kitchen Keith looked at her with something resembling pain in his eyes, as if he wasn't ready to have this talk just yet.

"Sweetie, can you please sit down? We need to talk."

"Mom's gone." _I might as well make it a little easier on him. You're supposed to rip off the band-aids, right?_

"Yeah, your mom's gone." Keith replied, letting out a deep sigh.

"Do you know where? Is she coming back? Are you going to look for her?" _That's it Veronica, bombard him with questions. He probably doesn't know more than you anyway. Don't make it harder than it has to be._

"She doesn't want to be found Veronica, she just needs time…"

"Time?! We all need time dad! Does she honestly think that she's the only one going through this? How can she just leave us? It's not fair, it's not fair dad…"

Keith looked at his daughter, crying, and enveloped her in his arms. He couldn't protect her from this, no matter how hard he tried. This pain wasn't something he could take back. The loss was just too great. No one deserves to be left behind. Especially not his daughter, she had been through enough.

"I know it's not fair, I know sweetie. It's never fair, but we can't force her to stay. It would only make things worse."

"But I can't lose anyone else, I can't do it. I need my mom…" Veronica sobbed, holding on to her dad with all that she had left. The hits just kept on coming, and she was afraid of going down with them.

* * *

"Weevil, man, we need to talk."

"What is it Felix? Can't it wait?"

"Well I thought you should know something man, about Blondie. Or should I say, about her mother, man."

"Well spit it out already, I ain't got all day!"

"Well, me and Hector were cruising around downtown late last night when we saw her mom get in a car. She had a suitcase with her, and by the looks of it she's not coming back anytime soon. So, I don't know, maybe you should check up on her. I don't know if that's part of protecting her."

"I'll deal with it Felix, thanks for being my eyes out there."

"You know it. Later"

_Damn, can't she get some breathing room? What kind of a mother leaves her daughter when she's going through all this? It's not my__ fucking place to do something Lily, although I bet you're pretty pissed at the moment. But I can't fucking go ring the doorbell at the former-sheriff's house. I'd probably end up in jail, cause he's nothing if not thorough. _

* * *

The silence in the house was deafening. Veronica kept moving her spoon up and down from her cereal bowl, as if eating, only nothing ever reached her mouth.

"Honey, you have to actually eat the cereals in order for them to fulfil their purpose." Keith tried his best, easing the tension that had settled.

"But now they're all soggy." Veronica smiled.

"Yeah, well, they weren't five minutes ago. What the poor, hungry children in Africa wouldn't give for a bowl of cereal. Think about it."

"I think they'd prefer them not to be soggy too." Veronica replied, tongue in cheek.

"I give up. At least God won't ever be able to say I didn't _try_ to raise you right."

"I don't think God eats his cereal soggy either."

Keith laughed, and the house at once felt a little less empty.

"How's the office shaping up? Have you got any new clients yet?"

"I've got a few, but I must say, I could use your magical fingers to do some decorating of the place. I don't know what happened, but buildings with stained glass always seemed more homely back in the day."

"And when was this exactly, some time during the disco phase you went through in the 70s?"

"I used to be cool, that's all I'm saying."

"Maybe I can stop by after I go see Doctor Friedman. It is Thursday after all, and I'm guessing the show must go on, right?"

"She's already been paid for, but if you don't want to go you don't have to. It was your mother's idea; she thought it might help if you could talk to someone on the outside of things."

"It doesn't, but I'll go. At least that way I'll have something to do."

"It's totally up to you. Just like cutting your hair was up to you. I like it, it suits you. Is it Cecile's doing?"

"Of course. She says to tell you to hang in there. And she quoted 'our brother' Sammy." Veronica smiled.

"A change is gonna come, huh? Well she's right. It always does. One way or another, it always does. Now, I'd best be going if we want any food on the table."

"Food's good. I'll pack the rest of the stuff before I head out. And then I'll stop by afterwards, but I'm not promising any miracles. I'm saving those for the apartment, mind you."

"Fine by me, you do whatever you feel like today, ok?" And then with a kiss on her forehead, he was out the door.

"Ok." The sound echoed throughout the empty rooms, and slowly made it's way back to her.

_Alone a__gain. Naturally._

_­­­­­

* * *

_

"How are you feeling today, Veronica?"

"Like crap, Debbie."

"Care to elaborate?"

"Not really. How come the offices' of shrinks all look the same?"

"Maybe it's a therapeutic thing. Maybe the familiarity soothes the soul, that kind of thing."

"But does it really work? Because personally I think it's kind of freaky. Like you've just entered the Twilight Zone."

"Well I guess it could be considered the Twilight Zone. Full of unexpected twists, at least when the subject of therapy tells her shrink what's really bothering her."

Silence immediately filled the room, suffocating silence that threatened to expose all flaws in the surroundings, especially those you don't want anyone to see.

"My mom's gone. She left a note saying she'll be back for me soon. I don't know if I want her to be. She hasn't really improved the _situation_ for the last couple of weeks anyway. She's only made it harder on dad."

"What's your dad's take on things?"

"He said that he's not going to look for her, that she doesn't want to be found. I don't blame him for not wanting to try. Because that's all he's been doing lately, trying to make her happy while all she did was try to drink it all away. I hope she at least realizes that no matter how far she goes, a part of it's always going to be there. She can't just close her eyes and pretend it never happened. Lily's dead, nothing can change that."

"Do you miss Lily? Do you still think about her at all?"

"Of course, how can I not?" And with that Veronica once again closed herself off.

_She doesn't understand. She wasn't just another friend, she__ was Lily. No one replaces Lily. She was my best friend for ten years, and now, not even three months later, I'm supposed to have moved on. I guess this really is the Twilight Zone._

* * *

"Dad?"

"Good, sweetie, you're here. There's something I want to show you."

"What is it?"

"Close your eyes. Come on just close them for a second."

"Dad…"

As Veronica did as she was told, Keith slowly led her towards the front desk where a box had been strategically placed.

"Ok, open your eyes."

"A box, that's what you wanted to show me?"

"Open the box silly."

As Veronica suspiciously let her fingers travel the outskirts of the box, she eventually ripped the lid off.

"A dog? You got us a dog?!"

"He's all yours. I thought we could use a little pick-me-up. And you might need the company if I ever have to go off and chase a bail-jumper. Do you like him?"

"Do I like him? I love him. He's so cute!" Veronica smiled her first genuine smile in days, and it warmed her own heart as well as Keith's.

"Do you want to name him? Pick something cool, like TransAm or Banzai."

"Banzai, seriously dad? No, I think I have the perfect name…" Veronica smiled secretly.

"Well, what is it?"

"I think I'll name him… Back-up. You know, because he's my back-up protector whenever you're away."

"Brilliant. I always knew you were the smart one." Keith smiled proudly.

Veronica just laughed, and it didn't hurt one bit.

* * *

_Games. Everyone plays them. Especially the people a__round us that so obviously deny it. When we're young we play all kinds of games, most of them innocent and fun. But I think we can all remember times when the same games turned into something else, something taunting and vicious when we least expected it. And everyone has turned on someone. _

_As we grow older, the games change and become more complex, and harder to figure out. And then, when you need it the most, you wish you were five years old again playing hide and seek with the world. I guess that's what my mother's doing. I guess she got sick of playing the hard games__. Well if everyone else can play games, then so can I. The gloves are officially off; I'm not scared any more. Cause now I can always bring back-up. _

Veronica threw the ball once again, and as a loyal follower Back-up immediately brought it right back.


	4. World on fire

**Broken in Two**

**Author's note: **I am soo sorry that it's taken me two months to update, it wasn't my intention, I guess life just got in the way. I hope the new chapter is ok, and there's a twist in there for you. You get to vote at the end of the chapter, there's another A/N there. I love reviews so please write a little something, and I'll try to be faster with the next chapter. Thanks to my beta, and for all the reviews.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything to do with Veronica Mars, cause if I did, Piz wouldn't even exist.

**Summary: **This is pre-series, takes place right after Shelley's party, and deals with everything that happened after that. This is my take on things.

* * *

Veronica woke with a start, hurled herself out of bed, and ran towards the bathroom only to find herself dry-heaving over the toilet. _Great, even my body is reacting to the fact that I have to go back to school today. As if being constantly reminded last night by nightmare after nightmare wasn't enough. _

As Veronica finally made her way towards the breakfast table she immediately noticed a glum look on her father's face. But he said nothing. She sat silently for a while, eating her cereal, pretending not to notice that her father was staring at her with worry. Finally she had enough.

"Ok dad, just spit it out. Whatever's on your mind; tell me already. Cause me and my cereal are getting a little self-conscious what with you staring at us like that."

"Oh, sweetie, I didn't mean to stare. I just can't seem to remember when it was that you got this big. It seems like it was just yesterday that you were running around the backyard, with your little blonde pig-tails, chasing butterflies." Keith replied with a smirk.

"First of all, it was bumblebees, not butterflies. And second, I didn't run. I hopped. Now, will you please tell me the real reason for your excruciating stare Mr Mars?"

Keith sighed. _She's always been able to read me like an open book. Not just me, anyone. Maybe she could follow in my footsteps, and make a pretty good P.I some day. She sure could fool anyone with her sweet-as-sugar-smile._

"I'm just worried about you honey, with today being the first day back at school and all. I know it was hard on you before Christmas break, and I don't want you to feel pressured to show up. If you need a couple of more days, just say the word and I'll call the school."

"Dad, I'm fine with it. Bygones. Ok? You don't need to worry about me, I'm sure things have settled down a bit." Veronica forced a smile.

"Ok." Keith got up and kissed her on the forehead. _Ok honey, but you're not fooling me, not for a second. You're not that good, not yet, and I hope you never will be. _

* * *

_Breathe Veronica, just breathe. You've walked into this school a thousand times. Just open your car door, get out and start walking towards your locker. It's just another day, like any other day. _

As soon as Veronica got out of her car she noticed the stares.

"Oh, look, McSlut has decided to show her face." A voice called out. Veronica immediately recognized it as Madison Sinclair, the wicked witch of western California.

Laughter enveloped the student body, as Veronica pushed her way towards the front entrance, trying her hardest to ignore the headache that was surely coming. As soon as she reached her locker, she knew that this wasn't just another day. This day would go down in the history books as the first day that slut was sprawled across her locker, with an inerasable marker. _And they say the youth of today has no intelligence and lacks imagination. I wonder where they got that idea._

"Hey Veronica, how was your Christmas break?" A male voice asked from behind her and even though it was sugar-coated and sickeningly sweet Veronica knew better than to let her guard down.

"What do you want Logan? Admiring your artwork?"

"What do you mean _Ronnie_? I wouldn't ever write anything like that on a _friend's_ locker." Logan smirked, as he spun around and walked away.

_I guess I can't count on Logan being happy to see me. __I've already been ousted, and it's not even first period yet. At least I don't have to avoid the stares from 09ers in my English class, maybe I'll even be able to breathe without receiving a stabbing remark from someone._

* * *

Veronica was wrong. About a lot of things. First period English had been vicious, especially since she walked in there with something resembling confidence. She hadn't counted on taunts from the 09er wannabes. She hadn't counted on getting spitballs stuck in her hair. And she definitely hadn't been prepared to dine alone in the quad. She ended up eating her lunch in the girls' bathroom because she couldn't stand the starring anymore. Eventually, the day had to end, of that Veronica was fairly certain. But as with everything else, she hadn't counted on the 09ers releasing all the air from her tires. _Oh, Lily, what I wouldn't give for you to come save me right now. And what I wouldn't give to get rid of these nasty headaches I've been having._

"Hey Blondie, wait up."

Veronica smiled, and counted her first blessing of the day.

"Hi Weevil…"

"How you holding up?"

"I'm doing alright. Actually, I was wondering…" Veronica nervously trailed of.

"Spit it out, V."

Veronica's head snapped up and she looked him straight in the eye.

"I was wondering if you could do me a favour."

"Sure, as long as it's not illegal. I've got enough of those problems on my own."

"Well, I was thinking that maybe you could take me to see your uncle. And ask him if maybe he could do a tattoo for me."

"_You_ want to get a tattoo?" Weevil eyed Veronica suspiciously.

"Yeah, I need a reminder."

"Ok… Well, hop on. I'll take you there right now."

* * *

As Weevil slowed down his bike, and pulled up outside of the tattoo-shop Veronica did her best to hide her anxiety by steadying her breathing. _I can't believe I've actually ridden on his motorcycle three times already. Dad would kill me if he ever found out. And I pray to God that he won't find out about me getting a tattoo, but maybe God isn't on my side when it comes to stuff like this. Jesus, what am I doing? Oh, I think I might be sick…_

"You ok there, V? You're looking a little green." Weevil smirked as he glanced back towards Veronica.

"No, I'm fine. Just because I'm not a veteran, like you, when it comes to tattoos doesn't mean I'm not ready. I'm not scared, ok? I mean, how bad can it hurt?" Veronica replied cheekily, not knowing who she was trying harder to convince.

"Whatever you say Shorty." Weevil laughed as he walked through the door.

Veronica stopped for a minute, took a deep breath and then followed him with determination.

* * *

Veronica lingered in front of the hallway mirror, examining the black ink that stood out like fire on the pale skin covering her left pelvic bone. She would now be forever reminded that she was stronger than them, strong enough to keep going. _**A change is gonna come**__. Those words will forever mean everything to me. It won't always be like this, I will get through this year, through high school and I'll get out of this town. Change is inevitable, and I refuse to give up just yet. They won't win Lily, you wouldn't let them and neither will I. _

As Veronica slowly traced the lettering on her skin, her hand flew up to her mouth and before she could register any thought she ran into the bathroom and threw up. _Oh god, there goes breakfast. And lunch. And the peanut butter cookies I made Weevil stop at the 7/11 for. I can't believe I ate the whole box; I don't even like peanut butter all that much. I've just been so tired lately. I'm sure it's nothing. Stress can make your body act weird right? I'm sure I'm just stressed out, about everything… _

(Flashback to Shelley's party.)

Veronica lingered around the corner listening to her friends' voices and immediately felt guilty about eaves-dropping on them.

"I can't believe she came, Logan. I mean, what kind of a person does something like that? Forget about her and Duncan, she betrayed Lily. If Lily was here right now, she would have royally bitched her out of the group. You did the right thing." Madison went on, totally oblivious to the fact that Logan was anything but interested in her opinion.

"Really, you think?" Logan asked pensively.

"Of course!" Madison shrieked.

"Cause here I thought she was Lily's best friend. And for a moment there, I was actually contemplating whether or not I did the right thing by shunning her. But your little pep-rally totally won me over Madison." Logan's voice was dripping of sarcasm as he began to walk away.

The line above here shouldn't be there. I just can't seem to remove it hehe.

"You're welcome Logan, I know both you and I have only the best interest of the group at heart.

"What heart?" Logan muttered.

Veronica just stood there, frozen in place. _I refuse to give up on our friendship Logan. You're just hurting. And if you need someone to blame for a while that's ok. I know that behind all of that anger, my best friend is still in there somewhere. I won't give up._

A silent tear made its way down Veronica's cheek as she turned and walked towards the crowd. Five minutes later, she had a drink in her hand. And as the whispers and stares started getting to her, she had her first sip.

(End of flashback)

* * *

The next morning Veronica tried her best to prepare herself for taunts and ridicule and slut smeared on her locker. They say you should always expect the unexpected, so she really should've held out for kindness. But no such luck, slut (with other various adjectives added) once again stood out against the other perfectly flawless lockers next to hers. _Mr Clemmons said he'd get the janitorial unit on it, I guess he's just had more important things to do this morning, Yay me!_

"Whatcha doing? Admiring your artwork _Ronnie_?"

Veronica turned around, wanting nothing more than to wipe that smirk off of Logan's face. But as she prepared herself for battle, she not only saw the entire 09-crew behind him, smirking as well but, for a short second she also saw hurt in Logan's eyes. And just like that her heart melted.

"Whatever Logan." She managed to squeeze out, then turned and walked away.

"What? That's the best you could do? _Come on_ Ronnie, give me something to work with here." Logan laughed.

As Veronica walked away she thought she saw Duncan standing around the corner, and she couldn't help but think that throughout everything he was standing idly by, as always.

_Logan just needs time, right? He's hurting, I know he is. I know he's still my best friend. Quite the best friend you've got Veronica, backing stabbing and sugary-sweet__, all rolled into one. But I made a promise to him that I'd never give up on him. I can't give up yet, I can't prove him right._

(Flashback to Logan's house)

"Logan, you're mom said it was ok for me to come back here. Logan. Where are you?" Veronica yelled out, as she made her way into the pool house.

She heard a noise coming from the bathroom, and quietly knocked on the door.

"Logan?" She couldn't help the concern in her voice as she opened the door.

And there he was, leaning against the bathtub, crying into his hands. As if his world was slowly starting to crumble.

Veronica rushed to his side, and immediately wrapped her arms around him.

"Ronnie, please, just go."

"Not until you tell me what's wrong." Veronica replied sternly.

"It's nothing ok, just leave it alone."

"I will not, you know I'm just far too nosy." Veronica said, trying to coax a smile out of him.

"Yeah, I know." Logan looked into her eyes, and Veronica had never seen such sadness in anyone before.

"Oh Logan, I promise not to tell a soul, whatever it is that's happened. But if you don't want to talk about it that's fine too, I'm here either way." She hugged him once again.

"I can't talk about it Ronnie, but will you promise me one thing?"

"Anything, I will do anything you ask."

"_Anything_?" Logan said, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Logan, be serious!" Veronica laughed.

"Just promise me you'll never leave me? That you won't give up on me?"

Even if Logan hadn't sounded as heartbroken and serious as he did, Veronica wouldn't have had a problem saying what she said next: because it was Logan.

"I promise, I won't ever give up on you. I couldn't."

(End of flashback)

* * *

As Logan made his way out of the boys' bathroom, he didn't even have time to blink before someone pushed him back inside.

"What the hell?!" Logan yelled once he saw Weevil standing before him. He caught a glimpse of the rest of the PCHers guarding the door as it slammed shut in front of him.

"Now you listen, you little punk-ass bitch. I've seen what you and your little 09-er friends are doing to Veronica. Writing slut on her locker, throwing spitballs in her hair. Not even letting her finish her freaking lunch. And don't even get me started on your ridiculous taunts. She was your friend man, she didn't do anything wrong, so all of this ends right here and now. No more games, cause then you and your little toadies will answer to me. Do you hear?" Weevil threatened.

"What, she's doing you now too?" Logan smirked.

Before Logan could react, Weevil punched him straight in the eye.

"Jesus, man. It was a joke!" Logan wasn't stupid enough to punch back, not with the PCHers right outside. And not when he knew he was the one who'd done something wrong.

"You'll leave her alone, or that black eye won't be the only thing you're sporting." Weevil said as he made his way out of the bathroom.

_I'll leave her alone, when I want to. She picked a side, now she has to stick to it. And it's not like she's even that concerned with what I'm saying to her. It's like she couldn't care less. What, __a new haircut and some combat boots, and she's all of as sudden a new person? We'll see about that._

* * *

Another day was finally coming to an end. Earlier Veronica had made her 'how to survive high school list'. Only something along the lines of 980 days until graduation, which seemed like eternity considering Veronica barely kept her head above water when she was at school. She could take the staring and even the taunts from some people. But what hurt the most was how easily the insults seemed to fly out of Logan's mouth. She'd seen the black eye at lunch, and assumed it was Weevil's doing. He'd of course played coy when she confronted him about it, and she ended up just saying that she didn't condone violence. He'd just smiled and walked away. She, however, couldn't just look the other way. _Logan used to be one of my best friends. And now he acts as if he doesn't know me at all. As if I'm just another girl, living on the wrong side of the tracks. _

"Hey Veronica, wait up." Veronica recognized Mac's voice, the girl she had run into at the mall over Christmas break.

"Hey Mac, what's up?" Veronica faked a small smile.

"Not much. Um, I was thinking we could maybe head to the mall and look into a computer like you wanted." _Mac asked herself if Veronica could really be as ok as she wanted to appear. I know I wouldn't be after days of rumours and taunting from the entire student body._

"Yeah, I'd like that. Do you have a car? Cause mine isn't very functional at the moment." Veronica replied, as she glimpsed down on her empty tires. Again.

"Yeah, it's the old wreck of a car over there. It barely runs, I mostly keep it around for status." Mac smiled.

"I know what you mean; the old LeBaron over here doesn't exactly scream functionality."

Veronica and Mac drove towards the mall mostly in silence, discussing some songs on the radio every once in a while. They both felt at ease though, like they knew that they didn't need to feel forced to say anything around each other. As they made their way across the mall parking lot Veronica paused momentarily as she felt her phone begin to vibrate.

Veronica glanced down at her phone. Unknown caller. After the last 24-hours of prank calls Veronica knew better than to answer and just hit ignore.

_One new message. I hope it's just dad, although with all likelihood it's one of my dear friends leaving me a nice little message. Rip o__ff the band-aid Veronica, it's bound to hurt less any second now. _

"Veronica, this is Doctor Petersen. I have your test-results back, and I think it would be best if you could come in for a talk. Give me a call, and we'll set up an appointment. Talk to you soon. Bye."

Veronica began to zoom out as soon as she recognized the voice at the end of the line.

"Who was it Veronica?" Mac asked curiously.

When Veronica didn't answer, Mac immediately turned and saw the tears running down Veronica's face.

"Veronica? What's wrong?"

Veronica looked into Mac's eyes, a mixture of devastation and horror playing across her face.

"Mac, I think I might be pregnant…"

* * *

Author's note: I have three possible outcomes that I'm gonna let you all choose from. One, she's pregnant and decides to keep it. Two, she isn't pregnant and hence doesn't need to decide if she's gonna keep it. And three, she's pregnant and decides not to keep it. And if you don't want her to be pregnant cause you don't want Duncan or Cassidy to be the father, then don't worry. It'd be Casey. Haha, just kidding. Vote, and give criticism, and hopefully it won't be two months before I write another chapter.


	5. Release Me

**Broken in Two**

**Author's note: **This is becoming a bit wellknown for me, but I am terribly sorry that it's taken me so long to update. In my defence I have been really busy; I've moved to a different country, started uni, I just had a death in the family.. I hope you like the new chapter, I went with what the vote said although I would've loved to explore the other options too. Thanks for all the reviews, please please please review more and I'll try and not take so long next time. Thanks to my beta Jess, who puts up with me.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything to do with Veronica Mars, cause if I did, Piz wouldn't even exist.

**Summary: **This is pre-series, takes place right after Shelley's party, and deals with everything that happened after that. This is my take on things.

* * *

"What?! Veronica, what makes you say that?" Mac was taken aback by the sudden revelation, especially considering she hardly knew Veronica at all.

"I'm sorry; I shouldn't have laid that on you. I just don't know what to do. What am I going to do?" Veronica started walking back and forth, aimlessly. _I can't believe this is happening, what should I do? What if it's…?_

Finally, Mac had enough and grabbed her arm to hold her still.

"Veronica! We'll figure it all out, but why do you think you're pregnant?"

"I've been feeling sick, nauseous. And I've had headaches and cravings and I've barely been able to keep anything down! And now my doctor called and said she needed to see me. What else could she possibly want?"

"Ok, calm down. I'm sorry; I shouldn't tell you to calm down. You should freak out if you want to; I know I would if I were you. I wouldn't know what to do…" Mac rambled on.

"Mac! You're not really helping…"

"Right, sorry. Maybe you should just call your doctor back, and see what she has to say?"

"I can't. What if I am pregnant, what am I going to do then? I can't have a baby. _They_ would have a field day if I had a baby."

"Ok, I get your point. Well, maybe you could just ignore it?" Mac said desperately.

Veronica looked at Mac closely for a few seconds, trying to calm herself down.

"Yeah, I can do that. Let's do that?" Veronica asked wistfully.

"The mall?"

"Let's go."

* * *

The two girls tried their hardest to pretend to be happy, peppy teenage girls doing some afternoon shopping. Neither of them brought up the awkward conversation from before, and both put on a stoic face, not letting the other know what they were really thinking. But hanging out at the mall, looking through heaps of clothes, had never really been Mac's interest in life. And Veronica couldn't really get into it, it wasn't the same without Lily there trying to force her into one revealing outfit after another.

So finally Veronica had enough of browsing through the clothes racks and sighed and turned to Mac.

"Mac?"

"Oh, I'm sure that would look great on you Veronica." Mac said mustering up some enthusiasm, pointing to the piece of clothing Veronica was clutching in her hand.

"Oh, that's not what I was going to say." Veronica said, hanging the random shirt.

"What I was going to say was that I can't pretend anymore. I have to find out; I have to go see my doctor. If I'm pregnant then there is a chance of it being…"

"Being what?"

"If I'm pregnant I think I know who the father is. And even if getting pregnant this young isn't what I had planned with my life, I wouldn't want anyone else to be the father."

"Do you want me to come with you? I will if you don't want to be alone. I know we don't really know each other that well, but if I were in your shoes I'd want someone at least giving me the option of not being alone in it all."

"Thanks Mac, I really do appreciate it. But I think I have to do this on my own. I have to learn sometime and it might as well be today. But if you don't mind, maybe I could call you tonight? Just in case I need someone to talk to?"

"Of course you can." Mac said, with a sigh of relief for being let off the hook, not knowing what she would have done otherwise.

"Ok, so I might call later, if not I'll probably see you in school tomorrow. Thanks for everything!" Veronica gave Mac a quick hug and then determinately hurried out of the store.

* * *

As Veronica made her way to the hospital on the bus she couldn't help but think about everything that she'd been forced to go through the past couple of months. _Lily dying, losing all my friends, being stupid enough to go to Shelley's party. Duncan. Logan... I can't believe I lost Logan, I can't believe he made me promise to never leave him and then he turned around and left me instead. If he hadn't left I never would've been in this situation. At least I wouldn't have been alone right now; he'd have been with me. I wish I could call him; I can't help but think that he'd want to know about this. Even though he is acting like we're mortal enemies at the moment. _

[Flashback to Logan and Veronica swimming in his pool.]

"Ronnie, come on, just get in already."

"Logan, it is freezing. It's so typical of you to even think about swimming in an outdoor swimming pool, in January, when it's like 50 degrees out." Veronica put on her best whining-voice. "Please, can't we go back inside? I'll let you beat me at one of your macho-killing-type playstation games." She gave him her sad-puppy-dog-eyes.

"You'll _let_ me beat you? As if I don't always beat you, at all games Veronica."

"You know what I mean. I'll go down without a fight."

"Oh really? You'll _go down_ without a _fight_" Logan smirked up at her from the poolside.

"Logan! Be serious." Veronica rolled her eyes, but couldn't the tiniest of smiles from appearing on her face.

"Ronnie please, just take one dip and then I promise we'll go inside. It's actually warmer in the pool than it would be for you to stand on the edge waiting for me." Logan sighed.

"Fine." And with that she dove straight in.

"Go Ronnie!" Logan laughed.

As Veronica surfaced, feeling slightly self-conscious as water seeped from her nose and ears, she found Logan staring at her.

"What? Are you now going to mock me for not being gracious enough, even though you practically forced me to dive in?"

"No, I just thought you looked cute, that's all…"

_Is Logan blushing? I don't think I've ever actually seen him blush before. Why would he…?_

"Logan, are you blushing?" Veronica looked at him incredulously.

As minutes went by without Logan replying, Veronica swam towards him, forcing him to look at her as she positioned herself right in front of him.

"Well, I think you look cute too." Veronica blushed.

"Really? Cute? Not incredibly hot or, you know, devilishly handsome?" Logan smirked back at her.

"Oh, well obviously, but those two are given. I mean, anyone can tell you that, but I'm guessing I'm one of the few people who have ever called you cute." Veronica trailed off.

"Actually, I think you're right." Logan took a moment and brushed a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Good, then you'll always remember me. Cause I was original." Veronica blushed again.

"Ronnie, I could never forget you. Not in a million years." Logan looked deep into her eyes, as he leaned in and softly kissed her lips.

[End of flashback.]

* * *

As Veronica exited the bus, her eyes immediately landed on a familiar face. And for a second she thought that, just maybe, she had made him materialize in front of her. But only for a second.

"Well, well, if it isn't _Ronnie_. What brings you here _princess_? Is it time for your weekly appointment concerning all the STDs you _acquired_ by sleeping with the entire football team?"

The 09ers around Logan snickered, enjoying the malicious new level of his insults. Veronica could feel herself blushing, and faced the ground in an attempt to hide it. Unfortunately for her, Logan always did have an eye for details.

"Aw, she's blushing, how cute. It's nothing to be ashamed of Ronnie… Wait, what am I saying? Of course you should be ashamed of it! To go from being the most _virginal_ girl at Neptune High, to being _sluttiest_, that's quite an accomplishment." With every word Logan walked closer, ending up face to face with Veronica.

"Be careful Logan, she might have something contagious." Dick shouted.

With that Veronica looked up, straight into Logan's eyes.

"You would know, wouldn't you?" She whispered.

For a split second, Logan actually had the decency to look ashamed. But for the untrained eye, it would have been impossible to even detect. And just like that, his mask slipped right back into place.

"Well, _Ronnekins_, have fun. Try not to enjoy the _examination_ too much." And with Logan turned and walked away, not looking back once.

* * *

Veronica was shaking as she walked into her doctor's office. What Logan had said, even though he did look remorseful for a second, had actually hurt her. It was beginning to dawn on her that the Logan she once knew might be dead and buried. And it hurt, because a part of her was still the innocent Veronica that she used to be, not so long ago. But that might all be about to change.

"Veronica, when we did the blood test on you, to see if you had any STDs, we found some abnormalities."

"Just tell me, am I pregnant?" Veronica blurted out.

"Pregnant? No, Veronica… We did however find that your white blood cell count was deviant. You had a very large number of white blood cells, so we did some additional testing and we found that you lack a large quantity of blood platelets…"

"What? What does that mean?" Veronica was officially confused.

"I'm afraid it means that you have acute lymphocytic leukemia." Doctor looked at Veronica with concern.

"But I'm not pregnant? And I don't have any STDs?"

"No, Veronica, but…"

"That's all I need to know for now."

"We need to start treatment for this Veronica. Acute leukemia develops rapidly, and it is extremely important that we start treating this immediately. The survival rate for children and young teenagers with leukemia is very good these days, _especially_ when you catch it early like we have."

"_We_ don't need to do anything right now. _I_ am however supposed to help my father at his office."

"You need to talk to your parents about this Veronica; it won't go away just because you ignore it."

"Thanks for the pep-talk."

And with that, Veronica rushed out of the room, determined to ignore and repress this until it simply vanished from her mind. Instead she chose to focus on the fact that it was payback-time for a certain mortal enemy. _If he wants to play rough, and forget what we once had, then fine. I may have promised to never leave him, but I never promised to be nice about it._


	6. C'mon Lets Pretend

**Broken in Two**

**Author's note: **I thought about holding out on you guys for a while longer, since it really hasn't been that long since I posted the last chapter. But I couldn't wait, so I'm expecting a ton of reviews now as thanks. :) Just don't expect this to become a habit, more than likely I'll fall back into my evil ways of leaving you hanging for a couple of months soon enough. Thanks to my beta Jess, and all of you who review.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything to do with Veronica Mars, cause if I did, Piz wouldn't even exist.

**Summary: **This is pre-series, takes place right after Shelley's party, and deals with everything that happened after that. This is my take on things.

* * *

As Veronica sat down behind her desk at the newly-opened Mars Investigations she couldn't stop fidgeting. Business still hadn't picked up, although several people had stopped by to show their loyalty, and to complain about what a crappy job Lamb was doing as sheriff. What Veronica hadn't expected was the person who walked through the doors next.

"Hi there Veronica."

"Mrs Echolls, um, hi. Is there anything I can help you with?" _I'm stuttering all of a sudden? Relax Veronica; you know Logan didn't get his evil streak from his mom._

"Actually, I was wondering if maybe you're dad was in? There is something I need him to do for me." Mrs Echolls smiled down at Veronica.

"Oh, sure, he's in his office. Just go right in."

"Thank you Veronica. It was nice to see you again. It's been so long since you came by the house…" Mrs Echolls smiled sadly.

"Yeah… It was nice to see you too Mrs Echolls." _Albeit a bit bittersweet. _

Lynn walked towards Keith's office, but suddenly turned around and faced Veronica.

"And Veronica, feel free to call me Lynn. It is my name after all." And with that Lynn smiled and gracefully left the room.

"Ok. Lynn…"

* * *

As soon as Lynn had left the office, Veronica all but ran into her dad's office.

"What'd she want? Did she want to hire us?"

"She did want to hire _me_ honey, but I can't really discuss the case with you. You know that."

"But I work here too, and maybe I could help. If she wants some dirt on Logan, I'd be the best source ever."

"Private investigation's no piece of cake honey; I don't want to drag you into this with me." Keith smiled sternly.

"Daaad, I need something to do with my time besides re-organizing the file cabinet three times a day, or walking Backup, and you know I wouldn't let it interfere with my schoolwork." Veronica whined.

Keith looked his daughter up and down for a couple of minutes, not knowing exactly what to do. But eventually his guilt won him over; if it wasn't for his mistakes in the last couple of months his daughter would be hanging out with friends after school, not wasting her teenage-years at his office.

"Ok, sweetie, you can help me. But only with whatever workload I give you, understood? No running around playing P.I. on your own because some of the people I have to get involved with might not be calm once they get caught doing whatever it is they're doing."

"Oh, dad, I swear I'll be good. I'll do whatever you ask of me. Oh, I'm so excited! Now, what did Mrs Echolls, I mean Lynn, want? And what can I do to help?" Veronica rambled on after she loosened her arms from around Keith's neck.

"Lynn is looking to divorce Aaron. She wants me to find proof of his indiscretionswith other women. And in doing so she wants me to help her secure custody of Logan."

"But Logan's old enough, wouldn't a judge just ask him where he wants to live?" Veronica asked confused.

"Normally, that might be the case, but this is going to be a high-profile divorce and Lynn made it pretty clear that Aaron won't go down without a fight. He has too much to lose; this will clearly affect his career and reputation."

"Do you think there'll be an open custody hearing?" _Cause even though Logan never spelt it out for me, I'm pretty sure there are some things that Aaron wouldn't want getting out into the open._

"Lynn doesn't want it to be, but there's no guarantee with these things. I do know, however, that _you_ are staying away from Aaron Echolls. You're leaving all the evidence collecting to me. I'll let you help with the papers and the development, but that's it. I don't want you to put yourself in danger; I don't know what Aaron is capable of if this gets out."

_Me neither. That's what scares me about this whole thing. Not him hurting me, but him hurting others…_

"I'll stay away from him dad, don't worry." Veronica smiled reassuringly.

"Good, now how do you feel about take out from Luigi's?" Keith said as he steered his daughter towards the front door.

* * *

The next day at lunch Veronica found herself stuck in a stare, focusing on none other than Logan. To her dismay, he noticed at the exact same time as she did, and in doing so started making his way towards her table.

"Well, Ronnie, you can't get enough of me can you?" Logan sneered.

"Yeah, that's it." Veronica found herself feeling a bit dizzy, praying to God it wasn't because Logan was standing so close to her.

"I don't do _trailer-trash_ Ronnie, and even if I did I wouldn't touch you."

"Is that so? Cause the past begs to differ." Veronica whispered, loud enough for only the two of them to hear.

"The past is in the past _Ronnie_, I suggest you try and leave it there." Logan looked down on her with a threatening stare.

"Or what? You'll trash my reputation? Oh, wait, you already did that." As Veronica got up to leave, she only made it a couple of feet before she almost fainted. Fortunately for her, Mac was right there to catch her.

"Veronica, are you ok? You almost fainted! Do you want me to take you to the nurse's office?" Mac asked with concern.

"No, I'm fine; the doctor said I was anaemic so I'm just feeling a bit weak, that's all." Veronica said as she glanced back to where Logan was still standing, watching her. He had the nerve to look concerned, as well as confused.

As the girls made their way back into the school Mac continued her questioning.

"Are you sure that's all there is? I mean, I know we're not really friends Veronica. But is that all the doctor said? You're just a bit anaemic?"

"Mac, you're the closest thing I have to a friend right now. And that's all the doctor said. I'm not, you know…"

"Oh, good. That's good. I wouldn't know what to do otherwise." Mac smiled weakly.

"Me neither." Veronica faked a smile.

* * *

"Hey, V, wait up!" Weevil shouted in the parking lot.

_I can't deal, I can't deal, I can't deal. Can't people just leave me alone? I was fine with no friends, I really was._

"You alright, V? I saw you at lunch; you looked ready to pass out. Did that Echolls kid say something to upset you? Cause if he did I can deal with that punk."

"I'm fine Weevil, you don't have to worry about it. Logan didn't upset me. I can handle whatever he throws at me."

"I told him to stay away, and if he's not then it becomes my problem cause he's provoking me. And that's something _I_ can't handle."

"Take a chill pill Eli, I'm handling it." Veronica snapped at him.

"Whoa, it looks like you're the one who needs to _chill_."

"I'm not a baby; I can take care of myself…" Veronica sighed.

"I know V; it's just so much more fun when I _take care_ of you." Weevil smirked.

"Wow, is he what's gotten you all worn out Ronnie? You're doing the local criminal element now? Must be tiring considering how pale you look, one would think he kept you up all night." Logan said as he passed the two by.

"Listen, rich boy..:" Weevil stalked towards Logan but Veronica held him back as she made her way to stand right in front of Logan.

"No, Logan, I'm not _doing_ him. So you can relax, I'm keeping myself all reserved for you. Just like old times." Veronica again whispered only loud enough for him to hear.

Logan looked deep in her eyes for a minute, seeing that it wasn't just snark and teasing clouding her eyes. No, deep inside he could see what some people would call an ounce of truth. He took a minute to compose himself and then relaxed as he started to walk away.

"Good." Logan looked over his shoulder, and gave her his trademark-smirk. _Her_ trademark-smirk.

Veronica just smiled and got in her car and drove off, leaving a very confused Weevil wondering what had just happened.

* * *

As Veronica made her way around the new apartment, still filled with packed boxes, she once again started feeling dizzy.

_This is not happening. I'm fine._

As she grabbed hold of the kitchen counter, she heard her cell phone ringing in her bedroom.

Deciding to ignore it, she made her way towards the faucet and drank some water.

_I'm not sick. I can't be sick. This is too much. This much stuff can't happen to one person._

"It is happening Veronica. And no matter how much I miss you, I don't want you to join me here just yet. You can't ignore it, cause it is real and happening right now. You've got too much to live for to just ignore it."

"Lily?" Veronica snapped her head up only to find an empty room.

_She's all in my head, isn't she? I am all alone in this. She's really gone, and I'm really sick._

Veronica made her way into her bedroom, tears streaming down her face, to check her phone messages. She collapsed on the bed once she heard the new message on her phone, confirming what she already knew.

"Veronica, this is Doctor Petersen. Again. I apologize for the bad news I gave you last time I saw you, but I don't think you quite realize how urgent this is. We may have caught your leukemia early, but it's still developing rapidly. We have to act now, or it might be too late. If you don't want to tell your parents right away, we'll deal with that later, but right now you have to come see me and start treatment. Veronica, it might be too late soon. Please call me back or drop by and see me. Leukemia isn't an easy disease, and I'm not saying it will be easy to beat it. It's more likely to be extremely hard, but I believe you can do it. Please fight with me Veronica. Fight for yourself."

As Veronica finished listening to the message, she grabbed her car keys and rushed out of the apartment. _I'm done fighting. I don't want to fight anymore. I want my mom, and I want Lily. I don't want to fight, I'm giving up._

* * *

As Veronica drove around aimlessly through the dark streets of Neptune, she eventually found herself driving onto the Coronado Bridge. The tears streaming down her face started to cloud her vision, eventually forcing her to make a full stop. As she made her way around her car, towards the ledge, she couldn't help but think that this was more than anyone should have to take.

_I miss Lily, and I miss Logan. And I miss my mom and all my friends and I can't be sick. I can't fight anymore, I don't want to. _

She positioned herself on the ledge, just sitting there, still holding on but looking down at the water as if there was no place to go but down.

_I'm sorry dad, I'm so sorry. But I'm not strong enough. It can't be me against everything anymore. I'm too tired to fight against the people I love. I just want sleep, just sleep. I can't fight anymore._

Veronica heard a door slam behind her, but she didn't bother to turn around and see who it was. She wasn't bothered by much at all anymore.

"Veronica, what the hell are you doing? Are you out of your mind?" Logan's voice sounded exasperated from behind her.

"Yeah, something like that…"

"Is this your idea of some kind of a sick joke? Get off the fucking ledge!"

"You know, telling someone whose sitting on a bridge to get off the fucking ledge might be the wrong thing to say." Veronica's voice sounded so weary that it took Logan a minute to compose himself.

"Ronnie, just come over to this side of the ledge, whatever's happened it's not worth killing yourself over."

"Don't call me Ronnie, Logan."

"Veronica, _please_, don't do this. Don't kill yourself over this."

"Kill myself over what? And besides, why not? I'm already dying."

"_What_ are you talking about?"

At that moment Veronica turned around, and with tears in her eyes, she uttered the words that would give Logan nightmares for months to come.

"I've got leukaemia Logan, I'm practically already dead. So you don't have to save me, I don't even know why _you'd_ try."


	7. Where were you when I needed you

**Broken in Two**

**Author's note: **This chapter has been half-finished for at least a month, but there were some parts that just wouldn't come out. But now it's done, I hope you like it. And hopefully I'll be able to write the next chapter faster. Thanks for the reviews, they're always appreciated, and thanks to my beta Jess.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything to do with Veronica Mars, cause if I did, Piz wouldn't even exist.

**Summary: **This is pre-series, takes place right after Shelley's party, and deals with everything that happened after that. This is my take on things.

* * *

"_I've got leukaemia Logan, I'm practically already dead. So you don't have to save me, I don't even know why _you'd_ try."_

Logan woke with a start. _Great, I finally get to sleep, and then I wake up like this after just two hours. God, I keep hearing her voice in my head. I can't believe she's sick, I can't believe I'm losing her. I'm a fucking idiot, what have I been doing these last couple of months? She sounded so broken last night, all I wanted was for it to be like it used to. But no, I fucked that up, just like I've fucked up everything else._

[Flashback to Veronica and Logan on the bridge]

"You have… you have cancer? Since when? I mean, what are they doing about it?" Logan stuttered.

"They're not doing anything. There's nothing to do."

"What do you mean there's nothing to do? Of course there's something to do."

"Logan…" Veronica almost pleaded with him.

"No, Veronica, there's got to be something you can do."

"I'm doing it, why do you think I'm here?" Veronica spat out angrily.

It took a minute for realization to set in, but as it did Logan immediately took a stunned step back.

"You've given up." It wasn't a question, more of an obvious statement. Like a slap in the face.

"Yeah." Veronica let out a breath.

"No, Veronica, you can't just…"

"I already have."

"Veronica." Logan was getting angry now.

"No! I don't need you to save me. Like I said before; I don't even know why you'd try." Veronica screamed as tears started to stream down her face.

"I can't just sit back and watch you kill yourself, I can help you. Please, let me." Logan pleaded with her.

"Where were you when I needed you? Forget about now, forget that I'm sick. Where were you the last couple of months? Leading a freaking crusade against me, that's where. I needed you then. I don't need you now." And with that Veronica jumped off the ledge, only to get in her car and drive away.

[End of flashback]

Logan immediately jumped out of bed, realizing that he couldn't wait another second to get to school and find Veronica. They may not still be close like they used to, but he still knew her routines. One of which is to always be early to school; her motto was basically that it was better to be too early than too late.

_I have to make this right; I can't let her give up on herself. Not like I gave up on her. We may not have seen eye to eye on everything, but she's sick. There are more important things than grudges right now. I have to make it right, even if it's the last thing I'll do. If I can't save her from this, then there's no point in anything anyway. _

* * *

The halls were always empty this early. Veronica liked it that way, to have a couple of minutes all to herself, without having to worry about anything. It was a bit ironic that she could relax and be herself at the very same place where she had to do most of her worrying. But that was when there were other students around.

As Veronica turned from facing her locker, she sighed at the sight of Logan standing right behind here.

"What do you want Logan?" Veronica sighed.

"We need to talk about this, about all that's happened. I can't just sit back, I just can't. You know me better than that."

"You're right; the Logan I knew wouldn't just sit back. But you're not him, you stopped being him the second my dad said something you disapproved of."

"Veronica, look, I'm sorry… about everything. But had I known you were sick…"

"Had you known? Do you _hear_ yourself?! Seriously, had you known? You were my best friend Logan, and you threw me away like it was no big deal. Did you ever stop to think that maybe if you hadn't done that, you _would_ have known?" Veronica began to turn away.

"Veronica, please, wait."

"No, I'm done waiting. I've _been_ waiting for you. I didn't give up on you Logan, but you gave up on me. And now I've decided to do the same, to give up on me. You can't hold it against me, because you taught me how." Veronica gave him one last glare, and then she just walked away.

Logan stood in the same spot, as the rest of the student body began to fill the halls. _You're right Veronica; I did give up on you. But it was only because I gave up on me first, and I thought you had done the same. _

* * *

It seemed like everywhere Logan turned that morning, one of his friends was either taunting Veronica or making up some new vicious rumour behind her back. At lunch he finally had enough as Dick went on a tirade about her.

"I mean, look at her. With her combat boots and short skirts, no wonder everyone thinks she's a slut. Short skirts give easy access and she probably uses the combat boots to fight off the unwanted. Whoever that could be, seems like she's done most of the people in Neptune now." Dick laughed.

"What, she even got to you Dick?" Cassidy tried his best to throw a barb at his brother.

"Shut up Beav."

"Both of you shut up." Logan sneered across the table. "In fact, if I hear anyone from this table talking shit about Veronica, or if it gets back to me that you've made up some kind of rumour about her, then there will be hell to pay. From now on, everyone leaves her alone. She's off-limits."

"What? Since when? Dude man, it's not like we've said something that wasn't true." Dick replied.

"Shut up _Dick_, we're moving on. I'm bored with her already; she's too much of an easy target. Everyone leaves her alone. And that's final." Logan said as he got up and left the 09-ers to recover from the news.

* * *

Veronica spotted Logan across the parking lot, and immediately walked over there.

"Who do you think you are? What gives _you_ the right to tell everyone that which doesn't concern anyone but me? It is none of your business Logan, and it sure as hell isn't the business of the lowlifes that you associate yourself with. Do you really think I want them to know? Don't get me wrong, having them off my back for a day has been pretty awesome, but I don't want their pity. They disgust me, and now instead of expecting ridicule when I come to school every day, I get to expect fake concern from fake people who really couldn't give a damn if I lived or died. What gives you the right…"

At that moment Logan chose to interrupt, and placed himself right in front of her, as to make sure that there was nowhere she could look but directly at him.

"I didn't tell them _anything_. No one knows Veronica, except you and me. They don't know you're sick, and they won't know until you decide to tell them. You really do think the worst of me, don't you? And those disgusting people that I associate myself with, do you honestly think that they wouldn't be all over you like vultures if they did know? I know them Veronica; I know what they're like. And I'd rather die myself than give them that kind of information about you."

"That's very _honorable_ of you Logan, but see, you already gave them all sorts of information about me. No one knew me like you did, remember?" Veronica moved even closer to him, with anger clouding her eyes.

"I still know you better than you think. I might not know everything there is to know nowadays, but how many people in Neptune know that you're sick? Does your dad even know?"

Veronica's comeback got caught in her throat for a minute when she realized that he was right. _Dear God, I can't believe that I'm admitting that Logan Echolls got something right._

"He really doesn't know?" Logan took a step back, shocked that he was actually right. "Why haven't you told him Veronica? You tell him everything, and this he really deserves to know."

"I don't tell him everything…" Veronica mumbled.

Logan grabbed the side of her arms and forced her to look at him.

"You have to tell him Veronica, he's your dad, and he's a good one at that. He deserves to know because you're his life. There isn't anything he wouldn't do for you."

"Logan... I can't." Veronica's eyes began to fill.

"You can, I know you can." Logan sighed. "He loves you. And I wouldn't be here trying to convince you to save yourself if I didn't care."

Veronica stared into Logan's eyes for a minute, realizing that her best friend _was_ still in there somewhere. He did know her better than anyone. _I missed you; it is so good to have you here. I don't know how I lived for so long without you by my side…_

But as soon as that thought flashed through her head, Veronica composes herself. There was a reason why he hadn't been there, and that was his fault, not hers.

"Thanks for not telling. I have to go." The spell was broken, and Veronica was halfway to her car before Logan could realize that the good winds had changed, again.

_I will get through to you Veronica, I know you, and I know that there is a part of you that still misses me as much as I miss you. This time I'm not giving up._

* * *

Veronica had just barely walked through the door, when she collapsed on the floor, sobbing. _I don't want to die. I want everything to go back to the way it was. I want to forgive Logan, and I want him here, holding me like he used to. I want to forgive him, but I can't. _

As soon as Keith walked into the apartment he saw Veronica, crying, on the living room floor. He rushed to her side, cradling her as if their lives depended on it.

"Honey, what's wrong? Did something happen at school? Did someone do something to you?" Keith asked. His voice was laced with apprehension.

"Daddy, there's something I have to tell you…"

"What is it sweetie, what's wrong?"

"I'm sorry I haven't told you sooner, I just didn't want it to be real. I wanted it to go away." Veronica cried.

"It doesn't matter, what matters is that you tell me now."

Veronica turned and looked into her father's eyes, seeing how anxious he looked, and realized that she had to tell him.

"Dad, I've been feeling sick, so I went to the doctor… She told me I have leukaemia, daddy."

If there was one thing Veronica would never forget, it was the look in Keith's eyes as she spoke those words. Worry turned to despair right before her eyes, but only for a second before he composed himself and embraced her once again.

"Honey, it's ok. It's going to be ok, we'll get through this. We'll call the doctor, we'll start treatment and we'll be fine." Keith said determinately.

"We?"

"Yes, we will be fine. We will make it through this. You're not alone. It's both of us fighting against this. I will never leave you. Do you understand that?"

"I love you daddy, and I'm sorry."

"Shh, I love you; it's going to be ok."

Keith held his daughter, praying to God that he was right. _My baby has to be ok, she has to be…_


End file.
